Untitled (Written December 2005)

Sorrow dwells where laughter swells

In the self-same well

Smiles drip like tears to tell

Tales tainted and memories painted

With colors too brilliant to sell

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A Terrible Poem

I don’t know why it gives me such pleasure

To imagine your fear and discomfort

I think, maybe, it is the only thing I truly enjoy

Sometimes, I feel sorry for you

Wondering what will happen next

Not knowing when the ax will fall

Not being able to predict what part of you I will destroy

The kaleidoscope of emotions

Ranging from warmth to depravity

I embrace them all within myself

But feel the best when in the throes of insanity

I suppose it would be more interesting

To stand idly by and bear witness

Oh to be a fly on the wall

Watching you under duress

But then the sadist in me is insatiable

So I must confess

It turns me on to hurt you

I just want to make your life a mess

Can you ever forgive me?

I Am

Written in November 1995

I am the darkness you try to hide

The ruthlessness that lies inside

An emotional roller coaster ride

Nothing can stop the pain

The trembling, thundering rain

I am the darkness you try to hide

In those faces, every day, you see

In their eyes, that cry, look inside, that’s me

Nobody thinks or cares to set me free

Some universal addiction to agony

As if they know, their laugh is snide

I am the darkness you try to hide

Like a vampire, my “life” is eternal

Like hell, I’m trapped in an inferno

My keepers seem longing for something maternal

I prefer to remain nocturnal

No matter how hard I try to die

I am the darkness you try to hide.